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September 28, 2012
The Brooklyn Nets’ Cheerleader Uniforms: Confronting the Nightmare
Gawker
by Caity Weaver
Gawker's Caity Weaver goes all Norman Oder on the just-revealed Brooklyn Nets' cheerleaders', er, uniforms.
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The new Brooklyn Nets' Brooklynettes cheerleader uniforms were revealed this week, and they are bad. They are bad in ways you would expect, like a cropped warm up jacket. They are bad in surprising new ways, like "painted sequin leggings." Because they are complicated, multi-piece ensembles, they are bad in many ways. Because they mostly consist of pieces of fabric bearing the word BROOKLYN in capital letters, they are bad in ways that seem Brooklyn-specific, but are, in fact, universal.
The above image, posted on the official Brooklynettes Facebook page, is of a now-defunct Croatian pop group called Saves9 who opened for M2M on three dates of their European tour in the spring of 2000. Just kidding! Those are the Brooklynettes. The four outfits represent only a taste of the squad's horrific ensemble (not pictured: "a neoprene scuba blazer with sequin leggings, a little cropped warm-up jacket, and painted sequin leggings"). However, because the only way to get over a nightmare is to confront it head on, let's steel ourselves for a quick analysis.
...In case you were wondering what kind of person would do such a thing to Brooklyn, the answer, reports the Post, is David Dalrymple. Dalrymple designed the nude-sequined bodysuit Britney Spears wore to the 2000 VMAs and travels back to that decade via time machine frequently for design inspiration.
Posted by eric at September 28, 2012 12:08 AM