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May 6, 2009
Damn you, lousy land grabber...
Rocky Sullivan's Pub Quizmaster Scott Turner just came up with an Atlantic Yards remix of the sidesplitting "Actual English Subtitles Used in Films Made in Hong Kong" (click on graphic to enlarge).
Turner explains:
Looking this over for the four-thousandth time, I got to thinking. What if these were subtitles from the battle to stop the Atlantic Yards project. The lines wouldn't be that different if they were uttered by Bruce Ratner himself.
- I am damn unsatisfied to be stopped by the community in this way.
- Marty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep.
- Self-inflicted cash wounds again?
- Same old rules: no democracy, no community voice
- A normal person wouldn't steal $1.5 billion in public money
- Damn, I'll burn your neighborhood into a Chuck E. Cheese.
- Take my advice, or I'll spank you without pants. (Some of these can't be improved upon...)
- Who gave you the nerve to voice your opinions here?
- Quiet or I'll blow your Wards Bakery up.
- You always use free speech. I should've ordered more community benefits.
- I'll fire aimlessly if you don't sell your home to me.
- You daring lousy Brooklyn.
- Beat his streets out of recognizable shape!
- I have been scared shitless too much lately! (Again, apt as is.)
- I've bought political buddies more than the number of your leg's hair!
- Beware! Your communities are going to be disconnected.
- The amoralities inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?
- How can you use my donations as a gift?
- This will be of fine service for you, you bag of the scum. I am sure you will not mind that I remove your manhoods and leave them out on the dessert flour for your aunts to eat. (Said to the city's unions and Ratner's own allies.)
- Yah-hah, Bertha Lewis! I have captured you by the short acorns and can now deliver you to your constituents for a thorough examination.
- Greetings, large basketball fanbase. Let us not forget to form a team up together and go into Brooklyn to inflict the pain of our Dodger nostalgia feets on some ass of the giant angry residents who want schools and transit instead of a sports arena.
Like folk songs, dates that live up to the hype, and a really satisfying plate of pancakes, good lines can change languages and change with the times, but they never stop bein' good. Even if they're very, very bad.
Posted by lumi at May 6, 2009 6:16 AM